Trying
by Hime no Shinigami
Summary: Byakuya reminisces about what's happened. He had fallen in love with the orange strawberry; but he's nothing like his sister...his dead sister. In all honestly, Byakuya feels as if Ichigo's not even trying to let go of the past. IchiBya.
1. Chapter 1

A/N: I'm thinking of writing for some new fandoms. This is one of my favourite pairings in Bleach - Byakuya x Ichigo. AU! Byakuya did not manage to stop Gin's Shinsou from piercing Rukia.

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Trying

Byakuya laid there, shivering. But he was content. It was nice…and warm. And he felt rather lethargic. The aftermath of sex always got to him this way. But still, he was content.

_He_ shifted and got up. Byakuya tensed. _He_ began to rummage around in the dark, looking for his clothes. He knew where the jeans were, but he didn't want to make a sound. Silently, Byakuya watched his…_lover's_ actions.

"Ah, there it is," fell from the lips that he both loved and hated so much.

Byakuya loved it when it was whispering softly to him, ghosting over his flesh, or even better – kissing him. He hated it when it teased him. Or even worse – moaned the name of his sister.

His god damned sister. Byakuya wished for Aizen's death. If Aizen hadn't wanted the Hougyoku so badly, then Rukia would still be alive. _No_, if he hadn't been so slow…then he could have saved Rukia himself.

He hated how important his adoptive sister was to _him_. It wasn't fair. It's as if _he's_ not even trying to forget about her. He didn't want to be a replacement for her.

Pain filled the slate gray eyes and he filtered it away. Byakuya knew he was being foolish. He never should have even allowed this affair. But he couldn't help it. And the feeling of _his_ reiatsu dancing across his skin when they made love, it was wondrous.

Why did he fall in love with _him_? He vowed never to love another after Hisana's death…so why did this…little _boy_ affect him so much? Yes, boy still in his eyes. He's barely lived a sliver of Byakuya's own life. How had he fallen in love with _him_? He was disrespectful, rude, brash, loud, and idiotic…so why did Byakuya feel his heartstrings snap everytime he left? Why did he feel so broken when _he_ had gently carried the body of his sister away from the Soukyouku Hill?

A soft kiss landed on the crown of his head. Byakuya looked up, surprised. _He_ shot him a rueful smile. And without saying anything, he leaves. But Byakuya understands fully and smiles softly.

_He_ **is** trying. This thought makes everything better.

"Ichigo…" he breathes to the darkness of his room, the smile fading as the reality of the world sink in.

They would never be together…no matter what.

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A/N: I know, I'm annoying right? However, I was wondering if anyone thought that I should **continue on** with this story **_or_** **leave it** as it is. Hey, you never know, I could change the rating to M like my others.

BTW, for those who care, Rukia's body was still intact after she died.


	2. Taste

A/N: **Important! There has been a small change in the last chapter. I was mistaken about the timeline. Rukia died after the Hougyoku was extracted. Ichigo **_**did**_** achieve Bankai in time.** I'm sorry. x.x

**Also, the rating has now been changed to M.** Please keep that in mind because I will be writing up lemons.

Furthermore, I have decided to continue _Trying_. (As you've probably noticed…yes, it took me the better part of a year to decide.) This chapter is relatively sweet. The next…less so, and more angst-ridden. Also, please be warned that I'm trying out a new style of writing and the characters might seem a bit OOC at times. I'm trying to bring out a different side of Byakuya – the one that was hinted at whenever there are mentions of Hisana.

Taste

Byakuya awoke with a start at the warm body next to him. _When had Ichigo joined him?_ Glancing at the antiquated wooden clock, Byakuya saw that it was nearly six a.m. – time for him to wake up. It had become a habit throughout his many years as captain that he no longer needed an alarm to wake him.

But seeing Ichigo beside him, he wanted to stay; just a taste and then he would be satisfied. Leaning over, Byakuya gently pressed his lips against those of his younger paramour. Wincing as he drew back, he realized that the distinct _flavour_ of Ichigo wasn't there…it was masked by something else. _Sake_. Anger coursed through his veins, the taste was faint, but it was there. If there was something that Byakuya did _not_ like about Ichigo, it would be the fact that he got drunk nearly every night.

_At least he comes back…_Byakuya's heart clenched at the thought. What if Ichigo didn't come back to him? _No…Ichigo __**had**__ to come back to him. To him and no one else._

Brushing his lips over the chapped ones of Ichigo's briefly, Byakuya then allowed his lips to worship the rest of his lover with feather-light kisses and soft nibbles. After the whole body was sufficiently litter with kisses – and sufficiently aroused, Byakuya sought to leave a visible mark.

Upon reaching the hollow of Ichigo's throat, Byakuya sucked harshly, relishing the taste. Satisfied that he had left a pink mark for the rest of Soul Society to see, Byakuya travelled further down.

In a gesture that he would never do while Ichigo's awake, Byakuya breathed in the scent of Ichigo's musk before engulfing him whole. Byakuya applied his recently learned knowledge and what he knew he, himself, liked to bring Ichigo maximum pleasure. He had only done this a handful of time. But in all honestly, he wouldn't mind being caught on his knees – _nobility_ on their knees, for Ichigo.

"Byakuya," moaned Ichigo lightly, not stirring from his sleep.

At least Ichigo was now acknowledging him on a subconscious level. He had hated it the first time when Ichigo had uttered _her_ name. Byakuya growled lowly in the back of his throat, the thought of Ichigo's love for _Rukia_ piercing through the iron curtain of his control. The vibrations from his growl travelled up and Ichigo's whole body tensed. Byakuya relaxed his jaw; it wouldn't be long now. Ichigo twisted and moaned a strangled cry as he came, body convulsing.

Hazy brown eyes flickered open. Ichigo, deeply sated, looked down. And his breath caught. Byakuya lifted his head, pearly white strings of cum sticking to the side of his mouth, and looked Ichigo directly in the eye.

"Byakuya," purred Ichigo, fully awake now, reaching out a hand.

The Kuchiki heir readily accepted the hand and was pulled flush against Ichigo's distinctively masculine body. Ichigo licked Byakuya's cheek, swiping off his own cum, and kissed him sweetly. It was a long, leisurely kiss; all tongues and lips. Neither party fought for control.

Breathless, Byakuya pulled back and stared into warm, brown eyes shining with unadulterated lust. A coarse hand came up and ran through his hair, gently massaging the scalp underneath; Byakuya shivered in lust. He _wanted_.

"Your hair looks nice like that," murmured Ichigo, flipping them over.

Byakuya blanched slightly but Ichigo didn't notice as he licked a path down to Byakuya's right nipple and took it into his mouth. To Byakuya's consternation, he didn't stay there for long.

A strangled gasp come from the noble's throat as Ichigo's tongue found its way into Byakuya's entrance. He keened as Ichigo darted his tongue into the small portal a few times, mimicking what he would be doing later with something much more pleasurable. Gently, Ichigo began to kneed the puckered skin with his lips, stretching it slightly. He didn't do this often, but the Kuchiki heir disliked lube and would rather prefer it dry; damned prissy noble.

Deeming it wet enough – and loose enough, Ichigo pulled back and looked at his normally stoic lover. The sight was breathtaking. The flushed cheeks marring otherwise alabaster skin; the throbbing erection proudly jutting out; the normally confined hair let down. Ichigo much preferred the hair loose and free, without the kenseikan. When it was down, it did not remind him of the cold noble who would allow his sister be murdered to uphold laws; instead, it reminded him of the desperate noble who did not manage to shunpo fast enough.

Tenderly, Ichigo pulled Byakuya into his arms, kissing him deeply and impaling him at the same time. He grunted into the kiss, the warmth around his cock was a testament that the infamous captain of the sixth squad was indeed _real_. He reached a hand down to Byakuya's neglected arousal and squeezed, garnering a hiss.

Breathless, the pair reached soared towards completion; hips pistoning faster and faster until a blank canvas of the purest white overtook their vision. Byakuya's back arched, as he voicelessly cried into his lover's lips. Ichigo for his part became totally rigid and shook as the aftermath crashed upon him.

"Mmmh, Byakuya," whispered Ichigo sleepily, eyes hooded over. "Stay with me."

Byakuya, in his dazed and content state, felt much obliged to honour that request. However, duty called. "I...cannot."


End file.
